Facing Our Fear

By Denice Whalen-White
Denice Whalen-White
Level: Basic

Ms. Denice Whalen-White is the Founder and President of the non-profit organization All Shades of Pink, Incorporated. Her passion is to help families and assist ...




An online definition of fear is to "be afraid or feel anxious or apprehensive" regarding a situation. To hear the words "you have breast cancer" can be a most frightening situation for a woman or man to confront. My friend, a young thirty-seven year old mother of two sons, shared with me that she was devastated when her doctor spoke those dreaded words. She said "life stopped for me at that very moment." She does not recall how she actually drove home from the doctor's office. Her mind was swimming with questions of what would this news mean for her children? Who would be there to take care of them if she was not here? Would she even get so see them grow up?

This four-letter word - Fear - can be debilitating and can cause you the inability to move left or right, forward or backward, up or down. You hope and pray that if you close your eyes and open them again, the nightmare will go aware. But of course, the nightmare does not go away. You may fall apart and cry your eyes out all night long. You may grab a blanket and wrap yourself up in it tightly and simply hold on. You may sit in the dark hoping your world would stop spinning out of control. But in the morning light, you must make a decision. Will you allow this FEAR to be the center of your life, or will you decide to FACE it head on? It is a personal choice. Others will tell you what they think you should do, but in the end, you must decide.

My friend chose to face her fear with purpose. She called me, and shared what little she remembered from the doctor's visit as it had become a big blur to her. She said that when she looked into the faces of her sons, she knew there was only one answer for her, she must fight to live at all cost. We went online to research the disease and formulate what questions needed to be asked at the next doctor's visit. Knowledge is power. She wasn't ready for the world to know, and that was okay with me. The preacher in me came out and I told her to read Isaiah 41:10 every day, "Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you." The future was not clear to her right at this moment, but it would become crystal clear if she would put her trust in the Lord. Through Him, she would find the strength each day to battle this enemy called breast cancer. She now knew that she had two friends with her in her journey - God and me. She realized that hundreds of thousands of women have gone up against this beast and conquered it and that she too would be a victor.

Today my friend is a 6 year survivor, overcoming stage 4 cancer, and is living a life of strength, love and purpose. No, it was not easy. The chemotherapy was hard and she was sick after every treatment. Then there was the radiation and her skin became extremely tender to the touch and burned. But, my friend had her eye on the prize, that her faith in God would strengthen her each day to conquer the enemy. Through her determination to survivor, she became a winner.

Since that time, I regularly speak to groups of women (and men), promoting the message to be proactive guardians regarding their breast health. If you have breasts, you are at risk for breast cancer. Our teens and young adults are never too young to learn how to do a self-breast exam. Everyone should be familiar with their body so that at the first sign of change, you will not dismiss the lump, the discharge, the smell, the skin irritation as something that will go away with a dab of ointment. When you discover something different from last month, contact a health specialist and find out if it is something that needs immediate attention. The saying "early detection saves lives" is true. When we act early we have a wide range of treatment plans available to combat the cancer. When we delay we diminish our options. Why wait to be told "if you had only come six months earlier, we would have been able to..."

I have heard women tell me that they know they are at risk for breast cancer because of their family history - a mother, a grandmother, or an aunt had it. When I inquire if they are performing self-breast exams, or seeing their health practitioner, or having mammograms as prescribed by their doctor, I'm amazed to hear the answer is "No." Upon further inquire, and far too often, the next response is "I'm afraid to know." They saw what the disease did to their loved one and they simply would prefer "not to know." Other responses are "I don't plan to live my life wondering if I have it or not" or "I'm going to live my life and what happens, happens."

For my African-American sisters, we cannot put our head in the sand and hope things will simply go away. There is a current trend that women are being diagnosed in their twenties and thirties at a higher rate. Waiting until you are 40 to start a breast health regimen is not enough. Many African-American women that are diagnosed with breast cancer are seeing an aggressive tumor that is referred to as the "Triple Negative" breast cancer. Where other tumors are hormone responsive, the Triple Negative tumor lacks estrogen, progesterone and Her2 receptors. The earlier this type of cancer is discovered, the treatment options are more successful.

Everyone has a right to believe what that want to believe. But I implore my sisters of all nationalities to not be nonchalant about their breast health. A few minutes each month of doing a self-breast exam can go a long way in helping you to act early and quickly if the lump you discover is not benign. Your situation does not have to be like the experience your relative may have had. There has been a great deal of progress made in the medical arena regarding surgical procedures, plans of treatment, and medicines used in combating breast cancer. It is no longer an automatic death sentence. You can have life after breast cancer.

As women united in the fight against breast cancer, we must take up our shield of hope and face our fear straight on. With God and an army of women tested in the battle on your side, what do you have to fear? Face your fear and live life, and live it more abundantly.

Denice Whalen-White, Executive Director, All Shades of Pink, Incorporated
http://www.allshadesofpink.org

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Denice_Whalen-White

Denice Whalen-White - EzineArticles Expert Author